I, like any other stupid woman,
fell in love with Jason perfect aspect of his personality. Who wouldn't ? The
guy had the best qualities any woman would die for... it was like Mr. Perfect
had been brought to reality. There are times that I would look at his
achievement and thought I was the smartest woman on earth for landing such a smart
man, maybe it is because he also made me feel that way. But the truth is, I wasn't.
I never took time to ask myself if I could accept his flaws. Yeah he had a lot
of best qualities but like any other human being he had his own flaws that I
never bothered to find out until it was too late.
They say marriage becomes hard
work once you have poured the entirety of your life’s expectation for happiness
in to the hand of one mere person. I was used for my life being that way, for
Jason to be this guy who would be responsible for my happiness. When his father
died and had to run the company on his own, it was a really heavy task for him
because he needed to make sure the company was doing well for the sake of his younger
siblings. He is a hard worker. He worked too hard that he barely had time for
his family. He was always on a business trip if not business meetings. I bet he even forgot how my food tasted. He would leave very early in the morning and
return very late when everybody was a sleep. There are days that he would fall
asleep in his office while I was in the bedroom, there are days that he
would forget that he had a daughter who needed his love. I became lonely, may be too lonely
and unhappy. I needed to be happy, suddenly all the things he could afford did
not seem to have any meaning.
Dear diary, I was always taught
that the pursuit of happiness was my natural or even my birth right. It is the
emotional mark of my culture to seek happiness. I wanted to find happiness at
all cost. Since money was not a problem I arranged a trip abroad to
visit my cousin with my daughter. When the day came I took Janice and went to
the airport, for the first time in many months Jason offered to accompany us.
I arrived at my destination (Hawaii) safely, my cousin so happy to see us. She had
arranged a number of places for us to visit when we were staying there. It was
a lovely idea I must admit. I suddenly forgot how boring my marriage had
become.
Sometimes life is too hard to be
alone and sometimes life is too good to be alone, I had tasted the bad side of
being alone after my husband turned in to a workaholic and now it was time to
taste the good side of being alone. On the following day we went to Waikiki
beach. It was a beautiful beach but it even became more beautiful when I bumped into
my former high school teacher that I really loved. Yeah Mr. Teacher, he was
even more handsome now, more of a gentleman than I ever thought. He was wearing
a floral short and a white t shirt that made it impossible for anyone not to
notice his strong muscles underneath. We exchanged contacts and since then it
became impossible for us to stop communicate.
Most things are forgotten over
time, the war, the pain, life and death struggles people went through may all
seem like something from a distance past once you have got that one thing you
have always been dreaming of. If I knew all this was going to be something that
I could never take back I wouldn't have done it, I lied to Mr teacher, I told
him I was married and I had a child but me and my husband where considering a
divorce (I know it was a stupid thing to say but I really wanted to keep him
longer by my side), I fabricated a lot of painful stories that made him feel
sorry for me. He was divorced so he started having this idea of us spending the
rest of our life together after y divorce.
After a month I traveled back
home, it was nice to be home again but there was a problem; my husband had
hired other two people to help him manage the company under the excuse of
wanting to spend time with his family. This is where everything really turned
upside down, Mr. Teacher was getting really serious and my husband was ready to
be a family man again.........
Read continuation "I brought it upon myself 3"
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